Hating the waiting game.

Barrera baby shower and Maternity shoot posts to come, but first: some venting.

I have occupied myself the past couple weeks with organizing baby things and getting Kaleb's nursery ready... and I think its seriously backfired on me.

I want my son. I want to hold him now. I love feeling him kick and move. I love that hes all mine right now. But I'm still going nuts waiting to "start".

I don't even know for sure how I'm feeling. Do I sound nuts? I don't know.
I mean, he SO big now.

32 week unborn baby (artist's rendition)

I'm 32 weeks and he is almost fully developed, but would still be a preemie if he was born now. I don't want THAT for my son.

This little guy was 32 weeks when he was born (photo taken on his birth day) .

I mean, look how big the precious little boy in the picture above is! That's what Kaleb looks like now. He is THAT big. But I do not want see my son hooked up to and patched up just because I want to see him now instead of two months from now.

I know he needs to stay inside as long as possible. I know hes going to choose his birthday, and it will be the perfect time when he does come, but I can't help feeling the baby angst.

I want to hold him SO BAD. I want to nurse him and kiss his little Green nose and pat his little Barrera bottom (which I can already feel through my belly!).

The baby boy above is at 32 weeks, just like Kaleb. Doesn't he look squished?

So, other Moms out there; did you go through this in your last weeks of pregnancy? How did you deal with out going nuts?

I love Kaleb so much. I love seeing Blake get so excited. I'm sometimes amazed by how much he already loves our son. I know how much I already love him, but I sometimes feel that's because I'm always with him. My body is my son's home. Compared to me, Blake can only spend a relatively short amount of time with the baby, and half that time Kaleb is sleeping or not moving.
But still, Blake holds my belly, kisses it and reads to our son whenever possible. He is already a father, and I honestly wasn't expecting that to happen until after the baby was born.

I feel so very blessed every day to have an amazing husband and a healthy, growing baby boy. I just hope I don't lose my mind waiting for him to come into the world!